Day 441 - Meeting the Sahara
A transformative journey that deepened my commitment to love, purpose, and interconnectedness. Reflections on love and quantum mechanics.
I’m writing this on route in the air from Morocco back to Sweden and the massive importance of this trip suddenly hit me.
These times of transitioning, as with me now leaving this experience and traveling back to Sweden, are so important and valuable. I sometimes, like now, feel like a window opens in which I can access a much deeper state of reflection and sense-making of my journey in this life.
In these states it feels as if words are coming through me rather than from me. Things resonate as deep truth, not in my brain but in my body, or more specifically for me in my solar plexus. I’ve felt and known this for quite some time, but got it validated from one of the mystics I met in Morocco that did a reading on me, that for me the most powerful energy center is the sacral one (which is located in the solar plexus), this is where truth resonates in me as deeper knowing, and from where my most wise decisions are made.
I could write a whole book about all the things I’ve experienced in this mystical land over the course of the past five weeks. This trip was huge. Energetically I feel that I have come back to myself, to power and to joy, and deepened my path of love even further.
I’ve come to realize just how life changing and important it is to expose ourselves to the right people for our path. Sometimes, the simplest sentence coming from the right person at the right time, can completely change the course of our life.
There’s so much to share and I’m almost shaking with excitement, I don’t even know where to start (could also be the late extra coffee I had to make it through the late evening flight). At the same time I know I only have space and energy to share a fraction of it all.
It constantly keeps coming back to love.
To choosing the path of love. Over and over again. In how we show up towards ourselves, others, all life forms and our planet.
Life itself is love. Love is the frequency at the core of all life, of all things. It is the magnetic attraction that brings all things into a beautiful dance of interconnected being.
We never receive love, we are love. And when we realize that, we realize that when we experience feeling love towards someone, we are only experiencing our own true ”self”. No one can make you love them, no one can give you love, they can only help you remove layers of blockage stopping you from realizing and feeling your own true essence.
I am so committed to this path and the deeper I get, the more motivated I become. I wish I could show you how I feel and see the world from this perspective. It is so unbelievably beautiful.
I give thanks to the teachings of sufism that I have connected so strongly with during my time here in North Africa. From my perspective, the works and words of Sufi mystics like Rumi is the path of love I am walking.
I want to share with you my story of meeting the desert for the first time.
I knew it would be a powerful encounter.
I’ve felt a longing and a calling for the desert for quite some time now, so I knew it would have a spiritually profound impact on me.
And so it did.
The first feeling in my body when arriving to the edge of Sahara was over-joying excitement. I wanted to run to the top of the tallest dune and scream from the top of my lungs.
I was in complete awe.
The Sahara was like nothing I have ever experienced.
I really struggle to put words to it, but it felt alive. It is alive in the sense that the dunes are always moving and changing, but it felt alive in a much more profound way. The vastness, the spaciousness, the curves, the light and the shades create the most mystical feeling.
It was just before sunset.
I ran to the top of the tallest dune and once there the vastness of the open desert behind it unfolded before me. I fell into complete awe and started crying, like literally sobbing. This kind of crying I have only experienced once before, and it’s the same kind of crying I imagine happens when people witness the birth of a child.
In that same very moment, a white butterfly came flapping its wings right in front of my face, as if it was both checking me out and welcoming me at the same time. Still sobbing, I fell to my knees and put my left hand on the sand, truly feeling the desert as if I was greeting it and thanking it for welcoming me. I cannot describe it better than feeling as if the encounter connected me to even deeper layers of connection and love to life. As if it somehow helped remove more ”blockage” or guiding me to even deeper layers within myself.
Just now as I am writing I came to think about what an incredibly powerful psychic medium and healer I met this fall shared with me. That I am meant to travel the world and visit certain special places, and that these places hold certain ”codes” or ”activations” in their energy that take hold in us when we visit them.
I am hearing myself as I am writing this and I see how crazy and way out there this sounds. But I have experienced too many weird and unreal things by now to not be open and curious.
Also, if you ever study or read up on the science of quantum mechanics I think it’s impossible to not be open to a different reality than the one we can see with our eyes.
It’s a fact that everything is energy, that all things vibrate and what we see as materia is actually waves and frequency. For scientific grounding, check out quantum field theory and quantum biology, it will completely blow your mind (and probably open it up to more spiritual interpretations as it has for me). A more controversial theory is the Penrose-Hameroff's Orch-OR theory which offers a scientific explanation to consciousness. Run them through ChatGPT to get a summary.
It is also a fact that all things are impacting each other by forces not visible to the eye, like gravity for example. Gravity is not only the force making the moon stay in orbit of earth, or earth of the sun, it is also a force between even two grains of sand, connecting them with each other just as it’s connecting everything. That way, all things are connected in some way (another completely mind blowing field of science is quantum entanglement, proving that things are connected beyond time and space), and so it’s a fact that the materia (waves) in me are somehow ”dancing” (or interacting/resonating/aligning?) with the waves of the place I am in. To use other words, I guess we could say that we are somehow receiving in this way just by being in a place. Seen from this perspective, the idea of a place holding and transmitting certain ”codes” is something I feel curious about but also very cautious to believe or accept as truth.
In general, I believe that most people (including me!) get so stuck on wording, like using the word ”code” (or ”God” as another example), that that’s where it stops for them. I try to see words for what they are - just metaphors, in lack of any other way to describe our lived experience and reality. That helps me stay curious about what the word is pointing towards.
Okay, now to the really exciting stuff.
In some more spiritual crowds or contexts you often hear people talking about receiving something referred to as ”downloads”. It always gave me a weird feeling and I felt a lot of resistance towards the concept, a good example of how I got stuck on the word but I also heard and felt it being used in ways that did not resonate. But I’ve come to see and understand it simply as moments of clarity. Moments that I have had myself my entire life and that I believe all of us have to some extent. I do believe that these can get a lot stronger and more powerful the more present and embodied we are (living less from our mind and thus less controlling and more open and accepting).
They usually happen to me when my mind is completely clear, when I am in the shower, when I go for a run, or am in a deep meditative state. The sensation of the experience is like words or imagination/visuals effortlessly unfolding before my mind’s eye, instead of being forcefully created through a cognitive process of the brain. When I speak or write in this state, it doesn’t feel like it is me writing or speaking because they are not words thought up in my mind, but rather it feels as if they are coming through me. I think every artist experience this. Very rarely (for me) these moments of clarity are not just words or visuals, but a whole future scenario. It’s kind of as if it takes me to a potential future reality and puts me there for a period of time.
This happened to me in the desert. And it lasted for a good 24 hours or so. That night when I went to bed on top of the sand, I could not sleep because it wouldn’t stop and once I actually managed to fall asleep I woke up again in the middle of the night wide awake and it continued.
During these 24 hours my experience was that I sat (a big chunk of it in the car as I was gazing out on the awe-inducing Atlas Mountains on our seven hour drive back from the desert) and received piece by piece from a potential reality of how my life could look like, centered on the person I had become and how I was serving the evolution of our world, in perhaps 5-10 years from now (my cognitive estimation of how long time it would take to build what I saw).
The vision was quite detailed, laying out an entire operation with a business model, the whole offering, together with specific places and people I was collaborating on it with. It put me there in a very visceral sense and I could feel how it felt like to be that person and to live that life, making me believe that this reality is possible, should I choose it and decide to work towards it. Putting it through a more philosophical lens from Einstein’s perspective that the unfolding of time is an illusion, given that I felt it and saw it so clearly, perhaps it is already here?
Incredibly powerful.
Honestly, what I am realizing now is that I already am on the path towards it. I can see quite clearly how the life I am already living and have created over the course of the past year is a stepping stone towards that future reality. We usually only see how the ”dots connect” when looking backwards, it’s so freaking cool when we can see it looking forwards. I can now see the path ahead of me more clearly. Or ”a” path I should say. Likely the one I am most probable to walk right now in this life. But we all know that the slightest event, or encounter, can completely alter our path and journey in life. We all have a vast range of probable potential future realities ahead of us. It’s just quite rare that we can see them.
This is where my favorite movie of all time comes in - ”Mr. Nobody”. For me, watching it feels like a psychedelic trip where it puts me in a state where I can sense and feel connected to all my potential parallell and future realities as if they are all already happening. The movie ”Coherence” is another similar mind-expanding film on the same topic.
I want to end with a reflection on why I am sharing things like this. Because I can definitely sense a fear in me publishing this. That fear is afraid to be perceived and judged as ”crazy” or ”too far out there”. There is also a fear that is afraid to be perceived and judged as self-centric or ego boosting, in my motivation for writing and sharing. It is true that I am self-centric (the vast majority of us live life from the perspective of a self), and I do have an ego, just like the vast majority (if not all) of us do. They are fears because if true, it likely means that my message and my sharing is rejected and not received, and then what point is there in sharing at all?
My motivation for writing these letters, and for sharing my life in general on social media, is purpose and meaning. I have received in numerous sittings, readings and mirrorings a message that deeply resonates within me, which is that I am here in this life to lead and show a way of a different and alternative life and way of seeing the world. To inspire and plant seeds of thought or ideas that may grow to alter other people’s perspectives and paths, perhaps to one more aligned with who they really are and the life they are meant to live (these things we often can’t see or understand, but we can feel it when it resonates as truth in our bodies). And yes, I can sense my ego coming along with me on the journey, and I do my very best to keep an awareness of its influence. I also want to recognize the ego as a great and powerful motivator, used in a healthy way with moderation in service of a greater cause, as long as there is awareness of it.
Thank you once again, from the core of my being, for reading me. I cannot express enough how much it means to me.
I love you,
Philip
Hejar på dig ❤️
Looking forward to hearing more about the download!